SPEAKER_02 0:01

Hey guys, are you ready to transform your mind so you can transform your mind? Coach Mirna brings you one-on-one coaching and expert guest weekly to get you to grow. Because happiness is the progressive realization of a working old. Looking for personal growth?

SPEAKER_03 0:20

Let's do it. This episode of the Transforming Mind Podcast is brought to you by Square. As an entrepreneur, I've learned that making it easy for clients to pay you is essential. I personally use Square to accept coaching payments and to collect deposits for my real estate business. And it has been a reliable part of how I run my business. I also love seeing vendors at the farmer's market accept credit card payments with their Square Hardware. The setup is simple. The payments are secure and everything is organized in one place. Right now, listeners can get up to $200 off Square Hardware when you sign up at Square.com slash G O slash transform. That's S Q U A R E dot com slash G-O slash transform. Get started with Square and build a setup that works the way you do. Because that was let me give you a let me give you a practical example so we can um let the listeners, you know, really understand what we're talking about. I know you're in Miami, so you do know Gabrielle Union, right? Right. All right. So when she was 19, she was working in a store and somebody came into the store and raped her. And that has been, you know, she's got PTSD. Um I read her book and she talked about the fact that, you know, she doesn't go certain places and she's scared to go certain places and she's always reliving it. And now that she's got kids and she's warning them, don't go there and whatever. So give us an example of you're you're you're raped. Um what happens um in in life? How does little T traumas feel like that rape?

SPEAKER_01 2:18

Right. So so when the brain records that kind of level of stress, right? It's an invasion of my of my privacy, it's an invasion of who I am. Um, it is you know, my life was a risk in that moment, right? So it's record it starts recording everything. Like we think that it's just going to record what we're seeing is what we're feeling, right? So all these things get recorded as high risk, right? The temperature in the room, high risk, right? So sometimes the person can walk into a room that looks like, feels like, sounds like, and I get when you say you're triggered, right? It's like this feels the same, right? Because after a traumatic experience, the body is recording all that information through the brain systems, and then it's always looking for that environment.

SPEAKER_03 3:15

Welcome back to the Transform Your Mind to Transform Your Life Radio, Podcasts, and Television Show. I'm your host, Life Coach Manny Young, and sitting in the guest church is Dr. Hector Rodriguez. Dr. Hector and I are going to be talking on the topic rewire your brain after trauma, the newer science of emotional healing. Welcome, Dr. Hector.

SPEAKER_01 3:37

Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_03 3:39

You're very welcome. I'm gonna enjoy our conversation today. All right, so let's dive in. All right, so the transform your mind show is where you can transform your life. If you've ever felt stuck in patterns of stress, trauma, or emotional pain, if you ever wondered why I keep reacting this way, this conversation is for you. All right. So today we're diving into the science of the brain, emotional resilience, and the powerful truth that you are not broken. My de guest today is Dr. Hector Rodriguez. He is a bilingual psychiatrist and brain expert who blends neuroscience with spec brain imaging and lifestyle psychiatry with spiritual insight. With both a medical degree and a master of divinity, he bridges science and soul to help people rewire their brains and claim clarity, connection, and purpose. So get ready to learn how to move from survival mode into a life of thriving. Love this, Dr. Hector. So, as we set the table, I want to ask you, I love your message that you're not broken, that we are wired to survive. That alone feels very healing. What does that statement truly mean from a brain science perspective?

SPEAKER_01 5:16

So, whenever we get any stressors that occur to us in life, um, the brain starts learning, um, the brain starts paying attention, starts realizing how you know the the stressor is, right? Is it a really big one? Is it a middle one? Is it a little tiny one? And as it starts to learn, it starts creating the networks and connections to see how kind of controls how we react to situations. And I use the word control because the brain really controls everything about us. People think that that we're, you know, it's us, right? And yes, in part we could redirect some brain activity in different ways, but the brain's job is really to protect us, it's really to keep us safe. And as it starts learning the experiences that we have, it creates this like certain network to let us know, oh, if this happens again, do this, right? So that's what tends to happen when we experience stressors, is right, starts learning, creates a network, and then it says, if this happens again, we're gonna do all this.

SPEAKER_03 6:24

Yeah, I know that. I know that the brain is um a response to keep us safe. And a response to keep us safe, like for instance, if we're saying, okay, we want to take this risk, right? The brain is gonna try to, you know, uh tell us that this is the safer path. But I didn't understand um trauma to mean you're right. There um so there's big T and little T, right? Or you call them big stressors and little stressors. So maybe a little stressor is um I would think, but doesn't really happen. A little stressor would be, you know, um being stuck on the highway for several hours, which happened to me recently, right? You know, we're we're in Florida here, um, and um, you know, I was driving on Alligator Alley, you know, a couple of weeks ago and they closed the darn road. So I was literally stopped for several hours. And that's a big stress, and that's a that's a big stressor to me, but it's a little stressor in in in terms of vice. But so we have a bigger stressor if you know someone dies or or whatever. So how does the brain get involved in these traumas? Like, I mean, you said that it it it it it wires itself with some networks to keep us safe. Give us an example of of what it does so that the next time, all right. So next time I'm stuck in a traffic jam, there's really nothing I can do.

SPEAKER_01 7:55

Right. So, you know, when we talk about traumas or stressors, I yeah, there's the big T traumas, which we tend to see them as like an assault, right? Things that um might not happen to anyone, or if it does, it happens to, you know, several people in a lifetime, right? The middle T traumas or the middle tea stressors, right, are big life changes that we all kind of go through. And I'm talking about like marriage, having kids, right? Those are traumatic experiences or stressful experiences in a person's life, right? So we tend to live in these. This is what most people experience as major changes in their life and major stressors. And yes, then there's a little T traumas like that. The you know, the coffee spilled over on top of you while you were driving, you're like, oh my gosh, I get but the brain learns all of them the same way, and what I mean by that is the different parts of the brain that work when it comes to regulate our emotions, like the temporal lobes, right? It regulates how we're gonna react to something. I call those the emotional breaks of the car, right? So we get anxious, we get stressed about something, right? We got all the information that goes to the brain, and then the brain goes, No, wait a minute, I don't have to react as bad to this because I already know that this is not a a big T trauma, right? It's not a big stressor, right? So it tends to gauge the sensory, right? The sensory information, all the stuff around us. So that's how it starts behaving, and the more, the more we experience things, the more it starts learning, and then it tells it spits out information like how much to react, how little to react. So then if it happens again, it remembers okay, well, this happened to me last time, I already know how to solve it. I don't have to react, so we don't have to turn on that temporal lobe to say, Oh my gosh, freak out. No, no, wait a minute. This already happened before, I already know what this is like. Turn on the memory, turn on the functional areas of my brain to kind of get through this stressor. So that's what I mean about it. Stars learning, and the more stressors we deal with, and that's just part of development, right? When we have a you're you know, a toddler, you have stressors, but when you get older and older, you start realizing, well, those are not as bad anymore. But now I'm facing new ones. The brain is still going to react all those sensory informations, all those different circuits, all those brain areas, they're still gonna turn on, but now it has the concept of memory, right? It remembered that this is not as bad, so I don't have to react, for example. I don't have to get frustrated. Now, if people have had major life stressors, probably the stressors that you and I deal with could we actually be amplified the reaction that they have to them. So, like I have a major life stressor, right? Let's say a rape, an assault, um, you know, something like that, really big, right? Um now my little T traumas can feel the same way. Interesting. So it's it's it's uh it's a change, it's a drastic change, and when someone experiences stressor, because in the normal development of life, we experience stressors throughout life, and then we adjust, and the brain learns, and we adjust, like like I talked earlier. But then if we have a big one that I didn't know how to react to it, and I was my life was at risk, then now the brain gets rewired in a way that is what I call trauma patterns that are only seen in people who've experienced big T traumas, right? And when I see by seen is we talked about you mentioned that yeah, I work with spec imaging. Spec imaging lets us see how the brain functions. So there's certain parts of the brain that light up on a spec scan, letting me know this person experienced emotional trauma versus an assault, which is something that they saw and then they witnessed, right? And again, it doesn't have to have happened to them, they could have seen it happen to another person, and it creates the same patterns because it's a survival mechanism, right? The brain wants to keep me safe. So if I recorded all this information, now it's like, oh, wait a minute, is my life at risk always?

SPEAKER_03 12:14

Okay, because that was let me give you a let me give you a practical example so we can um let the listeners, you know, really understand what we're talking about. I know you're in Miami, so you do know Gabrielle Union, right? Right, all right. So when she was 19, uh, she was working in a store and somebody came into the store and raped her. And that has been, you know, she's got PTSD. Um uh I read her book and she talked about the fact that you know she doesn't go certain places and she's scared to go certain places and she's always reliving it, and now that she's got kids and she's warning them, don't go there and whatever. So give us an example of you're you're you're raped. Um what happens um in in life? How does little T traumas feel like that rape?

SPEAKER_01 13:11

Right. So so when the brain records that kind of level of stress, right? It's an invasion of my of my privacy, it's an invasion of who I am. Um, it is you know, my life was a risk in that moment, right? So is record it starts recording everything, like we think that it's just going to record what we're seeing is what we're feeling, right? So all these things get recorded as high risk, right? The temperature in the room, high risk, right? So sometimes the person can walk into a room that looks like, feels like, sounds like, and I get we're triggered, right? It's like this feels the same, right? Because after a traumatic experience, the body is recording all that information through the brain systems, and then it's always looking for that environment. Does that make sense? So then that's what happens, right? They're always in hyper-vigilant mode, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:13

And that's exactly what she is, actually. She's in hyper-vigilant mode all the time. Yes. So that was a good example. So yeah, I I wanted to, you know, tie it together, right? So, um uh, so let's talk about some survival patterns using the same scenario, right? What are some common survival patterns that people don't even realize they're stuck in? So we can use the big T, the middle of the, or whatever small T you want to understand.

SPEAKER_01 14:40

It's a extra wired is all the same. That's that's the thing about it.

unknown 14:46

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 14:51

No, that the wiring is all the same. It's all the same. So, for example, you know, I I experienced um uh a fall uh a couple of months ago. I twisted my ankle really bad um in brickle. I was trying to get in my car and I didn't know there was a hole right next to the wheel. It was dark, and I was stepping for out of the sidewalk to to get in the car, and I stepped into the hole, twisted my ankle. When I walked by there, now I'm always careful of not walking in a hole, and it might not even be the same side of the street either, because it legit happened to me two months ago that I was in the same area because I went to the same restaurant, and I'm like, okay, this feels like sounds like it's at night, is the same thing. Am I gonna get injured again? Was my life at risk? No, I twisted my ankle, it was bad, I had to go to the hospital. But that's hateful too, right? Yeah, it was it was horrible. So then what happens now? I'm always careful more than usual. That before I wouldn't pay attention to that, I would just kind of walk and like whatever, right? So the same thing happens with the big T traumas. The thing with the big T traumas is that your life it was at danger, right? It was at risk, right? Um, I had a uh family that I'm treating, um, you know, they they went through a hurricane, right? It was a major life stressor, yeah. It was one of the big traumas. So anytime the weather just changes a little bit, they can get triggered. Is it gonna happen again? Right. So that's that hypervigilism. Exactly, especially here in Florida.

SPEAKER_02 16:26

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 16:27

So so that's what tends to happen, right? There's different circuitry um that that records information, right? Our prefrontal cortex, our PFC, is in charge of discarding or paying attention to certain things. So in those people, that prefrontal cortex goes down in activity, so then they have a hard time discarding information, right? Discarding, well, this is not gonna happen again. I don't have to pay attention to this street, right? To this time of the day, to this restaurant that I'm not gonna twist my ankle here again. But because there's poor activity, now I'm hyper focused on that, right? Too much focus. Because people think that, oh, you know, if there's a problem in the brain, it's because there's low XYZ. No, it could also be extremely elevated. And when it comes, for example, to sexual assaults, um, sometimes that's why some people experience actually hypersexuality after the assault, which you would think that the person does not want to even come near sex, which is the most people, excuse me, that experience uh uh a sexual assault, that's what ends up happening. But there is still some people that actually become hypersexual after the sexual assault. So the basically what happens is that there's a completely imbalance of the system that deals with sexuality in our brain, for example. So what what tends to be distorted is the balance, right? Some of these the responses and behaviors become huge, like hyper or hypo. So that's where that happens.

SPEAKER_03 17:57

That's a good one. That's a good one because I have interviewed, you know, because you know, it's it's um it's part of my life story. I've interviewed a lot of women on the show that um were sexually abused as a child and they become promiscuous. They became, you know, like, yeah, and and some of them has explained it to that they were trying to feel because somehow this person took away their connection ability and all that. But I've never tried to understand that. But we could probably use that example to talk about a survival pattern, because to me, a survival pattern is where you're stuck in this pattern and it's your brain um uh trying to make you survive. So explain that to us. What actually happens when something bad happened to her, big T, little T, small T, whatever. Um, and all of a sudden we're stuck in this. The brain gives us this pattern that we're stuck in. So perfect example of being promiscuous. You're stuck on this pattern, but it's a survival pattern for some reason. I mean, I've never able, I've never understood it because you're right. Mine would be don't you ever come near me? I don't, I don't want man to touch me. It, you know, my body is repulsed by them. Right.

SPEAKER_01 19:27

So, so when it comes to trauma patterns, trauma patterns are very unique to every individual. Um, it's really difficult to um, you know, to to predict what the pattern is gonna be, but it definitely creates a pattern of behavior, right? Some people do a lot of avoidance, which is the most common thing that's seen in people with PTSD. Um, but sometimes it's not avoidance. It becomes also hyper-focus on a specific area where they might even become hyper-focused on the theme of of trauma, right? Or hyper-focus on the theme of of that that thing. Because there becomes a a way to, yes, to try to understand the behavior, to try to understand the act. Um, and that's another pattern of of understanding how people behave. So the patterns of trauma are just very unique to every individual. And to say that this will occur to this person versus this other one, you really, you really don't. Because it be that's when your animalistic instincts kick in. And they are there, but the way that they manifest in each individual after a trauma, traumatic experience are very different. Um, but what I try to do is like, okay, let's look at this pattern of behavior that you're stuck in, this loop. What can we do to keep you, to release you? For me, trauma victory, right? Because I don't like to use the word survival for many reasons. We're not gonna get into that. But you know for me to say, I'm going to be able to heal from this experience, right? Um, takes a lot of time. And there's different ways and different avenues depending on the pattern for each individual, right? For some people, it might be completely uh avoidance of sleep, for example, which is a very common one in a lot of traumatic uh trauma people that experience traumatic experiences because of the feeling of vulnerability, right? When we feel vulnerable, then we say my guard is down. It could someone can do something to me again. So what do they do? They literally fear falling asleep.

SPEAKER_06 21:35

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 21:35

They don't like to fall asleep. Most people with traumatic experiences have a hard time falling asleep. But then there's people that that's the only thing that is seen in as a trauma, as a trauma pattern. It's poor sleep. They don't have any other ones, right? Even they could have experienced the same assault, right? I've had patients where it's been um certain visuals, right? Certain things. I had a patient that it was the color green, and it was because he was assaulted in a room in a room that was green. And he remembered that. And while the assault was occurring, he was just staring at the wall. So that's his fear. So he can't be around anything that is green. He can't see anything green, for example. Right. So there's very specific things to every individual depending on what they fixated during the event and what their brain recorded as that is safe enough for me to get through this moment. And then you know, then we go into like people that had repetitive traumatic experiences. And then sometimes what happens is they'll look for the same thing to survive that moment. Right? There's a really good book that talks about how when an animal um is trapped, for example, a bird, you trap it. The first thing it does, it freezes. Right? They'll hear the word, oh, it's playing dead. So it can let the person know I'm you know, I'm dead. Let me leave me. But it comes from a place of survival where if when the assault is happening, if I just freeze, maybe it'll stop. Like leave me alone. Right? Not everyone fights in an assault. Most people actually don't fight in an assault, and it's because of that. Their nervous system kind of freaks out in that moment, and then you freeze is one of the things that tends to happen. Um, some people do um do move, right? Fight or run away. Um, but not everybody. Most people just just freeze because the their you know, their ability to switch from one system to the to the next in that moment is kind of distorted.

SPEAKER_03 23:43

Wow, wow, wow. The business platform that helps sellers become neighborhood favorites. So whether you're gearing up for a busy season or just trying to keep up with everyday demand, Square keeps your business running smoothly, from payments and POS to online orders, inventory, staff, and more, all in one place. So you can focus on your customers and not your to-do list. I've been using Square in my own business for years as a real estate professional and as a coach. Square makes it easy for small businesses to accept credit card payments. I also love shopping at the farmers market and seeing the vendors accept payments with their Square devices. Square brings payments, PLS, inventory, staffing, and online sales together in one system. So business owners don't have to juggle a bunch of tools. You can sell online, in-store, or both, and customize your setup as your business evolves. Square and our offers three clear plans: free, plus, and premium. So you can pick the tools you need and grow into more when you're ready. Square helps you run your business more smoothly, bringing payments, operations, and insights together in one place. So you're ready for whatever is next. Right now, listeners can get up to $200 off Square Hardware when you sign up at square.com slash go slash transform. That's SQU A R E dot com slash G-O slash transform. Get started with Square and build a setup that works the way you do. So this is a good segue to ask the question, what exactly is happening in the brain with trauma? So you just said that the brain responds differently with everybody, but it's it is an organ that probably has the same building blocks, right? So why does it choose to have this pathway in one person and a different pathway and a different person? So I guess you can un you can explain that by saying, what is what's happening in the brain? How does the brain physically change with trauma?

SPEAKER_01 26:26

It changes depending on what the type of trauma that it does do. So, for example, if it's emotional trauma, you tend to have a lot of limbic activity. Limbic activity is the part of the brain that controls our emotions, our limbic system, but it also controls a lot of our circadian rhythms. So, for example, if there's emotional type of abuse, they tend to have a really active limbic system, a lot more than the other one. But we all know that most people have experienced traumatic experiences that they saw and they witnessed, there is some emotional psychological abuse that is also happening. So they tend to have those patterns too. But what is very unique to them is all the visual sensory information that is way too active compared to someone who has not. So that's where they can see something and get really easily triggered. That's why sometimes uh I'll have patients that are like, Well, I can't work with you because you're a male. Or I can't work with a female, right? Because it's just seeing that person that then reminds them of the perpetrator, so then they they really try to avoid it, right? But again, it's a visual thing, it's not necessarily how I make you feel or if I make you feel comfortable or not. It's just a visual. So that's how those areas of the brain start changing again, just to keep us safe. Because if I see something, taste something, touch something, you know, feel something that was like that place or that environment of what happened to me, then all those brain areas light up like a Christmas tree, and I go into survival mode immediately.

SPEAKER_03 28:03

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm loving this conversation because I love anything to do with psychology and how the brain and the mind work and all these different things. So part of this whole brain activity, trauma stuff in the brain is also our inner voice, right? A lot of people have this negative self-talk and um the you know, voices in their head or and things like that. I call them ants, automatic negative thoughts. So tell us about someone that has trauma and have these negative thoughts. Are these negative thoughts blame? Like you shouldn't have been in that location, you should have done this, or where is it coming from?

SPEAKER_01 28:48

So they're all coming from the part of the brain that I actually love the most. It's called the posterior singular gyrus. The singular gyrus system is a part of our brain that um gets fixated on ideas, thoughts, um, anything like that. It gets fixated when it's overworked. The posterior part of the brain, it gets fixated on things about ourselves. So every person that I have seen with traumatic experiences have a very active posterior singular gyrus. And that just means that they tend to self-blame and they have like an inner voice, like an inner, I call her the inner bully, um, that we need to rewire, we need to retrain to not be that way. And it comes from, when it comes to trauma, it comes from a place of if I do XYZ or if I say XYZ, then they won't do it again. So it starts creating this perfectionism kind of mentality in the person because if I am perfect, or if I'm like this, or I don't do this, or I don't do that, then they won't do it again. That's where the where the connection with trauma comes. Right? And and yeah, it's an inner voice that that is there, and and we see it on the scans all the time. So when I see that, immediately I have to go into like, okay, we gotta look at what these thoughts are. You'll always notice a common thread with all of them, and it's blaming myself for whatever happened. Yeah, um, whatever the thought is, they're all if you boil them down, it goes down to blaming myself for what happened. Because uh, whatever you know, in that situation, if we wouldn't have been there, it wouldn't have happened. If you think about it, it's also a survival mode, right? If I would have done this or that, then that would have happened. And we all know that there's nothing that we could have done to prevent that from happening. That was done to us, yeah, yeah, right. We are not to be blamed. It was done to me, but the healing comes when I separate myself from that event, meaning I am not defined by that event, I am not defined by that person, and I have to physically, and I say physically, like for real, physically, mentally separate myself from the event and that person, or that hurricane, or that car accident that happened. Yeah, so I so it doesn't become my identity, and a lot of people who are still experiencing PTSD symptoms is because they haven't been able to do that yet.

SPEAKER_03 31:19

They haven't been able to separate themselves. Yeah, as you're talking, I'm thinking to myself, right. Um, I've I've I've I I have read a lot of you know testimony from women that are raped, and people tell them, oh, your dress was too short, or why did you walk down that street and you know it's dark, or why were you out at two o'clock in the morning, you know what I mean, and you feel blamed. If somebody breaks into your house and rapes you, I'm not quite sure how you can blame, but I'm pretty sure going back to Gabrielle Union, I think she should have locked the door or she felt that she should have done something and you go to blame. But yeah, I I know that wherever negative self-talk is coming from, it's it's coming from the fact that that you're putting yourself to blame for for something that happens. Now, I don't know how how you how you can be blamed for a hurricane unless you say the people told you that you should evacuate and you didn't go.

SPEAKER_01 32:14

Or you shouldn't have been living in that area because it's prone to hurricanes or earthquakes.

SPEAKER_03 32:18

Right, yeah, okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:19

It's like, well, no, again, these things happen to us. We did not cause them. Right. Right. And when we start seeing those events that way, is when healing actually starts. Because then I can say, This, you know, this is something that was done to me. I am now defined by this.

SPEAKER_03 32:38

Right. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 32:39

The person that did it or the right that person chose to do that.

SPEAKER_03 32:44

Yeah, that's right. Right. Or for whatever reason. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

So when we start seeing those events as that, because it is the reality, it is what happened. Yes, right. Then we can start starting, we we can start our healing process.

SPEAKER_03 33:00

Wow. Yeah. And I'm listening to you, and I know that I'm in this space, and I've interviewed lots of people on on this the brain and the mind, because that's what this show is about. And I know that it's hard work. We're talking here, and I know it's very hard to do. Um, because you you're wired, right? You're you got to rewire the brain, and it takes work and uh probably years to do it. So, but it's probably gradual little steps, you know, they they they come to you, and you know, I know we're gonna get into the spirituality aspect of it, but spirituality actually helps a lot of people because you know it's higher power and things like that, and we're gonna talk about it in a minute. But if someone is listening right now and they're recognizing themselves in our conversation, they've had uh the big T, little T, you know, middle T, you said everybody goes through middle T, right? And they're they're stuck in this loop. I love the way that you call it. It's a loop, right? What are some of the things that they can start doing on a daily basis to kind of strengthen their mental resilience and start rewiring the brain?

SPEAKER_01 34:11

You have to start understanding your own behaviors. You have to kind of start studying what you're doing. Almost like if you're watching yourself. Um, because if you don't understand your own patterns and where they're coming from, we're gonna have a hard time doing that. Now, you can always go to a professional identify, they'll identify them for you. Because we've seen this a lot, right? Um, and start seeing this as it's a biological process, it's not a moral process, it's not an ethical process that is going on. Where I'm going with this is there's the the whole blame concept goes out the window because this is not this didn't this didn't make me a bad person. Because what happens is some behaviors could be irritability and anger and frustration, but you're expressing it that way, and then you start having issues with family members and friends, and people are just avoiding you because you're this mean person. Well, you experience something traumatic and fight or flight, but fight is one of those. And after the fact, you tend to then start seeing those kind of behaviors. So when you start understanding, okay, I'm just angry because of what happened to me and I couldn't save myself in that moment. And now that I kind of realize what happened, now I'm I'm dealing with the stressors, now I'm angry all the time. And this is the part where you know, I you see you hear people a lot complaining, well, this is how I'm dealing with it, or this is how you know it was this was done to me, this is what I need to do. I don't think so. Because just by you hurting other people in your healing process, then you're creating trauma in them. So, no, that that that's not effective, that method. You know, a lot of people can argue with me, and and I I commented on a post a while ago, and oh my goodness, I got bombarded with comments, and I'm like, Well, no, because now you are choosing to be angry, right? Yeah, and I say that, I'm sure we're gonna get what this is not a choice at this point. It is a choice because now I need to understand wait, my anger is part of this pattern. Yeah, I wasn't angry before, right? And you always have to see uh you know, how was I before XYZ? Right, and you hear people say that, oh, before blah, you know, I was like this, or after whatever, now I'm like this. Okay, so now you know that's a product of that event. And if we're going to a place of like I'm not being identified by that event, then anger is I can be identified by anger, but today I'm dealing with it's anger, and I don't know how to express it, I don't know how to how to get rid of it. Well, yeah, that's what I mean about understanding your own patterns, and it's not always the the the classic PTSD patterns.

SPEAKER_03 37:15

Yeah, I hear you. Um, and and because I live consciously, I'm I myself are able to um, you know, to see patterns in myself. So um several years back, um, you know, I was very hurt by some adoptive children that I had. And I found myself getting angry. And I am a bubbly, warm person. And when I started feeling that this anger was coming up, I said to myself, you know what, I need to talk to a therapist to see what exactly is going on there. And um, and she said to me that, you know, you stuff all these things down, right? So that it's coming up as anger. So she told me that whenever I'm feeling triggered by something, then I read and release it out. So that has worked for me. But yeah, so now, you know, I kind of don't get angry anymore for things that I'm I can get angry at my husband or whatever. But um this was just me sitting here being angry, and I knew that there was a problem. You know, my major traumatic experience happened when I was, you know, 10 or 13, 50 years ago. So I know I'm not carrying that now, but there are some things that happen, like you call it, you know, you keep getting, you know, re-traumatized by life and the big Ts, middle T's, and you know, I think it was like a middle T, it wasn't really a big T, middle T, you know, life, right? You have some ungrateful children.

SPEAKER_01 38:42

And that's and that's the other thing, too. Yeah, most of the time that person also experienced their own levels of stress and trauma, and this is what they're what they're expressing it, right? So then imagine, yeah, two people that have experienced trauma, how that interactions are gonna go.

SPEAKER_03 39:00

Well, that's exactly it, because you know, I adopted children that were hurt, right? So, what do you do? They hurt other people, right? And I was caught in there, and I'm thinking they should act this way, and and they can't, right? So it was very hurtful to me as a person. And I kept saying, Boy, I give you this much, and you're just ungrateful and all that. But once you understand that they're not able to love, they're not able to connect, right? They're not able because of the trauma that they've been through, right? So, anyway, but I I'm just you know, at least at least I can tell you this with certainty.

SPEAKER_01 39:36

Right now, they're not able to.

SPEAKER_03 39:38

Right, right. That's what I heard.

SPEAKER_01 39:41

You know, therapists said to me, when they get to the 30s, maybe they'll or when they actually maybe heal from their own trauma, then they start seeing, oh, wait a minute, you know, this person was taking care of me, was loving me. Because, you know, you are also able to heal. And now you're also able to look back at like, well, maybe some of that behavior that I did wasn't me, right? Sometimes I say, Well, that's the try I I use the word that's the trauma talking, right? That's the trauma behaving, right? That's not me. That's not what I mean to do, right? So then, but you have that self-awareness now. That posterior singular that I talked about, why I love it so much, is that if you train it well, you can turn it into an inner cheerleader. Okay, and you can actually cheer yourself up, not beat yourself down like a bully. Okay, right. So, but that ability to have self-awareness comes from that same place. So most people who've experienced traumatic experiences can actually be a lot more resilient than the average person because of that part of their brain, because then they have emotional intelligence, which is that's where the emotional intelligence comes from, the posterior singular gyrus. So it's about being able to also retrain that psychological system, because then you can build a person that has a lot more resilience than anybody else, because now they're self-aware, they're aware of the pro of others and their feelings and their emotions, and that's emotional intelligence.

SPEAKER_03 41:06

Yeah, yeah, I agree, yeah. And then they say, you know, we'll get to the spirituality part now. But the uh, you know, the Bible says what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, so you become stronger. All right, so you uniquely bridge science and fate. How does science and spirituality work together in healing trauma?

SPEAKER_01 41:28

So, spirituality, I don't separate it. And I say that because whether you believe in whatever you believe, it's there, right? The spiritual realm is there, whether you believe it or not. Um, you know, it's like um I remember a while ago, I had to explain that to a teenager. I'm like, you know, do you believe in gravity? And they're like, Well, no, yeah, I mean, it's not something you believe in. I'm like, exactly, right? It's not a belief system, it's there, right? Whether you like it or not, right? And in other parts of the universe, there's no gravity, right? So that concept, the same thing happens with spirituality. The way we communicate and connect with the with the spiritual world is actually also a brunt, a brain uh brain function. Um, our right temporal lobe is where a lot of the spiritual understanding lives, right? So I I know that because that's the part of my brain where hopefulness lives, where resilience lives, where the understanding of more lives, it's in the right temporal lobe. So what does that tell us? That tells us that for whatever reason, that was placed in our brain to function that way, to have a connection with the spiritual world. So for me, is okay, so we experience this traumatic stressor, this event, this thing that occurred to me. If I don't identify by now, what? Right? What's next? Right. I already, you know, I'm healed, I'm healed from it. I separated myself from that event. What is what am I supposed to be working towards? What else should I be looking at? And that's where I say we look at the spiritual world, because then I can start looking at things like resilience, right? What is resilience? Resilience is I'm able to go through stressors and get through the other side like if nothing happened, just brush myself off, right? I can go through the same thing again, just like we talked about at the beginning, and I can brush myself off because I know what to do now, right? I learned from that. Now we have to be our eyes open and really learn from from from what's happening and how my body is reacting to it, and now after the fact. But then we got to look at things like discipline, integrity. These are pillars that I pay attention to the most because it creates uh a person that becomes more human. And when we become more human, that's where the spiritual world comes in. Right? We we look talk about the concept of faith. Right. But faith without any of those things, there's nothing there. Right. We have to have the discipline. We have to have the motivation, the integrity, the the the ability to say, I understand this and I'm gonna pursue it because I want I want more out of this, you know, this physical world.

SPEAKER_03 44:20

Okay. So um I understand that. So if someone believes, you know, when you started off talking, I I remember, you know, someone that was part of my family and didn't believe in God because he said it's not logical. So I know exactly where the right brain people in and the left brain people, the right brain people are gonna have hope and they're gonna have they're gonna look at the sky and they're gonna see beauty and they're gonna look at the trees like me, right? And know that there's a spirit in the trees and all that kind of stuff. I'm very right-brained, but the left brain person is gonna be logical. It says, Well, if there's a God, why don't I see it? I mean, why can I touch it? However, you want to label that. So, um, but I I didn't get the your explanation of how that helps with trauma. I mean, I was thinking about, you know, um I also had a a very close friend that was addicted to crack and he couldn't get off of couldn't get off of it. And he went through the Salvation Army program several times. It's a two-year program, and they lead with spirituality. I'm not sure what they do there, but uh it's somehow in order to recover, you've got to believe in God and you gotta believe um uh whatever you have to believe. So, you know, so that's where I was going with the question. How does spirituality help you release the trauma? I guess that's the proper question.

SPEAKER_01 46:01

Well, spirituality definitely allows us to release the trauma because of the hopefulness part. Okay, right. If the person is hopeless, they're really gonna have a hard time releasing the trauma, right? And that it really takes us down the avenue of of spirituality, right? Because something I can't see, right? Um now when someone is more quote unquote logical, right, and they use that excuse because I and I call it an excuse because you just you just are trying to have you know two people that that see things different ways communicate to each other, and that's gonna be kind of difficult. You're still gonna kind of find that middle person to be able to make that happen because anything that is God related is totally logical, it's just how it's explained to that logical person. So let's say you have this person that only sees a circle, right? And then you have another person to see a sphere, a sphere with like specific colors and textures on that sphere. So they're trying to communicate with each other, but one can only see circles. You can throw a bunch of spheres at them and they're like, Well, I see a circle, I don't see the details, right? Because that's just I that's all I need to see to survive, and I'm fine with it. There's nothing wrong with that person, right? But the other person sees fear now. The other person cannot see a circle, so they might spend hours over analyzing this fear when the other person just move on, right? So so you have two different people. So that's the same thing with when we're trying to explain spirituality to someone who only sees circles, right? One is not better than the other, it's just how he sees that world. All we have to do then is show them that in that sphere, God also lives. It's just you have to explain it to them in their terms, right? In in in circle terms, that makes any sense, right? Where the person that sees fears, you need to show them the flowers and the sounds and the music and and the sense, right? So they could understand who God is and what God, what God is, right? So it's it's about communication, it's about understanding. So you have to use the right language for each person. So in my studies in theology, it's super logical to see that the spiritual world is there, right? But if we were going to explain it to someone that sees only circles, you need to explain it in their terms because they're not gonna get it, right? And the same thing vice versa.

SPEAKER_03 48:32

Right. I love your I love your analogies because I, you know, I can see it right away. Cause yeah, you look at a it's like a donut, right? You look in the hole and you see nothing, but or that's probably not a good word, but you look at a cell, for instance, and you see nothing, but you know there's activity in it, that's probably better way, right?

SPEAKER_01 48:51

The person has to know that they have to have the knowledge, right?

SPEAKER_03 48:54

Right, right, right. Yes, that's that's perfect. I love your analogies, awesome. All right, so your field is uh this spec imaging, which is S-P-C-T, and I I know that the S P E C T stands for something. So um, let's talk about that and how you use it to help somebody that has trauma and survival loop and you know, patterns, and they have to think outside the circle. I mean daddy, you help them with that.

SPEAKER_01 49:31

Spec is something that um that we're we've been using in in psychiatry to look at brain activity, but it's not the only one. Um, that one is just easy to explain it to anybody. So that person that sees circles, they can totally understand it when I show them the spec image. Um, but the first reason why I use it in some people um is because some people need to see, right? They can't just go by what I'm telling them, right? They want a visual, they want to be able to understand more, right? Remember, we talked about earlier that usually people with trauma they hyperfixate on on the events because they want to explain it, they're looking for an explanation, so they want to understand more. So I understand that. So a spec is a great way to start showing them. Listen, you're not crazy, right? You're not making it up. Look, and I go like this because there's a a diamond pattern that shows up on the spec scan, and that's emotional trauma. So your reaction, all these areas that are lighting up, these areas, this is causing this set of issues, this other area, this other set of issues, and this one, all of this, and all of that is because you experienced this diamond pattern that is showing up on the brain scan that tells me you went through a psychological stressor, you went through an emotional stressor. So you did not all these symptoms, all these problems that you're having in all these areas of your life, you're not making them up, right? Because that is where a lot of it starts. It's for them to see I'm not making them up, I'm not crazy, I'm not this bad person, I'm not the stupid person that I think or people think that I am, right? So showing someone in in in in color that their brain is behaving a certain way is a lot easier than for me to sit there and tell them, right? So it starts with that, why I like to use images. Um, and also I used to be a fashion photographer, so for me, images is super easy to explain.

SPEAKER_03 51:26

Um, I'm very visual.

SPEAKER_01 51:30

So um I like to explain that way so people can understand it. And then when I break down every single area in our evaluation and I tell them how that leads to this whole thing of PTSD, um then they're like, okay, now I want to do what you're telling me to do. Because it's not just about taking a picture of your brain and how it's behaving, it's now what? What's next? What am I gonna do now? Where am I gonna go? Because when people experience trauma, some people are looking for something, right? And then they'll try everything, and you can't try everything because that's a waste of time, money, and resources, and you need to have a good structure and plan to say you're not ready for this. You can let's start over here first, and then we do this. Because sometimes if you do some therapies too soon, you actually get really triggered, right? Right, you know, so that also maps for me what the next steps are gonna be in this person's um healing process. So it that doesn't just give them the visual, but it gives me the ability to plan.

SPEAKER_03 52:36

Just set the program for them. So as you were talking, I thought to myself, um, so someone will come in and says, Yeah, I was sexually abused as a child, I was raped, I was, you know, the physical stuff. But we also started off our conversation that spilling coffee when you're driving or something, and maybe you crashed, that could be a little tea trauma, but your brain reacts the same way. So, how many people come in and you show them this spec scan and they weren't aware that they had trauma? Is there any such thing?

SPEAKER_01 53:08

A good number of people. A good number.

SPEAKER_03 53:11

I thought so. I got that when you were talking.

SPEAKER_01 53:13

A good number of people. Because they've all, you know, but when someone comes to me already, they've been through like four or five psychiatrists, they've been diagnosed with four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten diagnoses. And I always, you know, I was at a lecture um that I gave not so long ago where I did my residency, and I and I talked to them about this, and I said, When you start putting five, six diagnoses in someone, it's none of those. So you got to look for what really it is, and usually in these people, it's PTSD.

SPEAKER_04 53:40

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 53:40

But because it's manifesting so differently to psychiatrist A, I think this is depression. Psychiatrist B, I think.

SPEAKER_03 53:46

I was just gonna say depression is probably the top one, right?

SPEAKER_01 53:49

Yeah, so so then they come with multiple diagnoses, multiple treatment plans, and that's where I'm always like, listen, if we gotta diagnose correctly, effectively, so then we put together a treatment plan for that person and in certain steps because this is not Tylenol, you're not just gonna pop a pill and in four hours you're good, no pain. No, no, no. This is a lot more complex, like the whole system gets restructured. Okay, you know, all right.

SPEAKER_03 54:17

So that that sounds really great because yeah, I thought so. Um uh because you said middle tea trauma, everybody has um, but some people are resilient and they, you know, they go through it and they get to the other side, and some people stay stuck, and then you have the little tea traumas that they're not even aware it's a trauma, but the brain uh kept saying, No, I don't want to go there, and I don't want to go here, and I I don't want to talk to this person, and I don't want to, you know what I mean? And and you're thinking you're just avoiding life, but that that's the one I know about, or you talk about the fact they become high po and they do the same thing that they should be avoiding. So, yeah, this was a great conversation and I love it. That's if I'm gonna take away anything from this conversation, is that the brain process it all is the same way? It's it's beautiful, it's beautiful, beautiful brain we have here. You know, they can't, you know, they they even all the knowledge that they have, they can't recreate it. So it's a beautiful thing.

SPEAKER_01 55:14

And and it's something that I do tell people when we start going in through like hardcore into the healing process of trauma. I always, you know, because then they're like, let's say anxiety is one of them and panic attacks, and people tend to fear those and reject them. I'm like, listen, every once in a while, thank your brain for getting anxious. Yeah, that that's an alarm telling me there's something wrong. Now it doesn't always turn on because it doesn't have to be, but yours is hyper turned on. So we just have to rewire it, but thank it because that's part of its job. It's it's an organ.

SPEAKER_03 55:49

I like that. Reframe it.

SPEAKER_01 55:51

Yes, I love it.

SPEAKER_03 55:53

I love it. All right, so tell our listeners how they can connect with you, your website, social media, so they can get um connected with you for this powerful work that you're doing.

SPEAKER_01 56:04

Sure. Um, so our our website is whitebutterflyclinic.com. That's the name of our practice. And um, Dr. underscore Hector is on my Instagram, and White Butterfly Clinic is the other one. So we're pretty much everywhere. We also have um a wellness magazine that it's based on these pillars that we talked about. Um, so every issue is a different theme, like the resilience issue, the integrity issue, um, the confidence issue is the latest one that we have up there, and they're all free and they're on our website. Um, and that's where you can find us.

SPEAKER_03 56:40

Wow, that's amazing. All right, so they go on your website, and if they're interested in um psychiatry, um, it tells them there what to do.

SPEAKER_01 56:50

Mm-hmm. Okay. Yeah, everything is in there. Very, very easily used.

SPEAKER_03 56:57

I love it. I love the work that you do. I'm pretty sure there's a lot of people that's listening that would say, wow, I need to get me some of Dr. Right, Hector, right. Amazing, amazing, amazing. All right. Well, I'm gonna have a you know, summary of my conversation with Dr. Hector on the show page, I which is myhelps.us. I will link out to his website, a link out to social media so you can follow him and get some more of this great information. Yes, listen, you know, our brain is a super, super organ and everything that you do. I was even telling my daughter the other day, you know, you can't do anything without your brain first being aware of it. You can't pick up this pen, you can't bend down to touch your toes. Your brain has to send a signal. If the brain doesn't send a signal, you can't do it. So I'm be I love the brain, I love the mind, I love what it what it does for for humanity and what it does for humans, I should say. So uh I love everything about this conversation. But if there's one thing that I'm taking away from this, is that you are not broken. You know, we didn't talk a lot about that, but you're not broken, right? Your brain adapted to protect you. And the beautiful news is that it can be rewired to heal you. Right. You know, it's it's going into protection mode, but you know, with Dr. Hector and the work that he's doing, uh, once you become aware of something, then you can address it. But if you're not aware of it, you can't address it. So, yeah, so Dr. Hector reminded us that healing isn't just about managing our symptoms, it's about transforming the way we think, feel, and live from the inside out. So this episode, you know, blessed you. Make sure that you subscribe, leave a review, share it with someone who needs to hear this message. I know you know someone that's stuck in a loop, that don't not understand why they're angry, why they're hypo something when they should be hyper something. So, yes, and um, so remember, Transformers, that's what I call you guys now. When you transform your mind, you can also transform your life, transform your brain. Yeah, so I love this episode. So, Dr. Hector, as we wrap up, any last words of encouragement for our audience?

SPEAKER_01 59:27

I would always say, take care of your brain. You only have one, you can get a transplant, so take care of it, feed it well, give it exercise, protect it, because it's our most important organ.

SPEAKER_03 59:40

It is, it is the most important organ, one that you can physically see. You know, I talk a lot about the mind, and nobody knows where the mind is, but we all know where the brain is. Right, yeah. So listen, thank you, Dr. Hector, for being on the show. Thank you for a lot of the aha nuggets that I'm gonna take away from our conversation. Thank you guys for tuning in to this week's episode of Transform Your Mind so you can transform real life. So we're gonna add another thing on there. Be aware of what your brain is doing and um be conscious of it. And if you find that you have a problem brain, then we can heal it. Right. So thank you, Dr. Hector. Thank you guys for tuning in. Until next time, keep growing, keep healing, and keep becoming your best self ever. Naniste